Running in Circles

There's something about hobbies that I've noticed. It seems that all our hobbies involve filling up some inner void that we have. For example, I like to read, because my life isn't terribly exciting and reading allows me to have adventures. I like to go on the internet, because I won't be able to feel degraded or left out with people that I've never met and alot of those people have never met each other as well. I'm fond of pretty things, because I don't feel beautiful very often. But sometimes I feel that by running from my emotions in life and putting them into hobbies, I seem to be running in a circle and in the end, feelings of despair are still lingering behind and it actually feels worse than when I face these feelings in real life. Its like after all this time spent 'enjoying' myself, feeling good that I'm just as good as anyone else, it all seems to fade as time goes by. Every problem as a flaw that becomes its solution and every solution has a flaw that could possibly prevent the problem from being solved. There seems to be no ultimate solution to problems and all I can do is use these temporary escape solutions and the negative feelings seem to get bigger like a snowball rolling down a hill covered with snow. In the end I still feel stupid, unworthy, and ugly. Sometimes I ask myself why I bother still trying to run away and deal with people who are obviously not nice no matter how much they try to appear to be or why I try to still do things to make myself feel good when in the end, I just end up feeling like a failure. I end up feeling really mad at these people I deal with from a combination of hatred and jealousy. Then, I seek out some other solution to these problems and in the end I still feel the same way. I think that maybe its time I leave this world of internet and go out in the real world, try some more new things instead of being who I know I will never be satisfied being and try to enter circles of friendships I know I will never fit into.