"Tyra Banks is Fat"

http://metromix.chicagotribune.com/news/celebrity/ktla-tyra,0,751970.story?coll=mmx-home_bottom_hedsh2o

Oh man. Do we really have to go there? From my years of shopping at Superstore and browsing the covers of various tabloids and magazines while I wait in the heiniously long lineups to the cashiers, I've seen all the pictures of the celebrities at their worst from"Mary-Kate Olsen in Rehab for Anorexia" to "Britney Spears With Celluite at Twenty-Two!". Then of course, next week, you see the exact same magazine print pictures of the same celibrity looking all glamorous on the red carpet and the headlines commenting on how great they look. I mean, its not like I'm sitting here with my great morals telling you how I'm sickened every time I hear about a scandal. I mean, I'm like everyone else, I can't help but subconciously rejoice when I hear about a "perfect" person screw up. However, hearing about the media go on about how Tyra Banks is fat sickens me. I mean, for God's sake, everyone's heard about America's Next Top Model and everyone has watched at least one episode despite what they tell you and pretty much everyone's watched the Tyra Banks's Show before. Why won't the tabloids ever think about how much of the female population looks up to Tyra Banks? She provides the model wannabes and people who are struggling with their body image that being thin isn't everything and that females have curves and thats natural. We're not supposed to look like sticks. I saw one of the episodes of her talk show about little girls who think they're fat and they're dieting before they've even learned how to spell the damn word. It just depressed me, you know? I mean, kids are supposed to be all innocent and stuff but look at Barbie dolls. Which girl hasn't wondered why she doesn't look like Barbie when she's playing with the doll? I mean, I certainly wondered why I didn't look skinny like that and still miraculously have boobs. I don't particularly admire Tyra Banks and I do think its slightly hypocritical of her to preach healthy body image when she used to be a model, someone that sells their looks for money and she hosts a modelling competition that is again, all about looks. However, I do admire the fact that she's made a decent effort into talking about body image with the whole wearing a fat suit to show viewers how prejudiced people can be to people who are overweight. Now how are the little kids going to look at this and her efforts in changing people's views towards their body? What kind of message are the tabloids trying to send?! For once, can't they shut up and pick on somebody that at least deserves to be picked on? I mean, if you want to plaster pictures of Lindsay Lohan drunk, I don't care.

Open-Closed Mind

So I saw in a newspaper today that Hilary Clinton was running for President in the United States and I remembered a conversation I had with someone a couple of weeks ago. We were talking about how the way people thought changed over time and prejudices about race and women changed. When you think about it, really it hasn't changed much. Think about politicians. How many are women? When David Emerson switched from the Liberal Party to the Conservatives after the Conservatives won the election, sure they called him a traitor and all but they didn't say he was "whoring" himself in the parliament the way the did when Belinda Stronach switched from the Conservatives to the Liberals. The Premier of Alberta commented that "Belinda Stronach never had a Conservative bone in her body except for one, if you know what I mean" referring to her ex-boyfriend that was also in the Conservative Party. I mean, alot of male Politicians have been involved in scandals, but the media just doesn't seem to judge them unfairly the way they judge women. Even in wages for common people. For every dollar a man makes, a woman makes sixty-seven cents. If a man isn't married by thirty-sixish or so and he has a great career, he's an eligable bachelor. If a woman was in the same situation, people tend to look at her as if she has some sort of problem for wanting to establish a career before having a family. Even my parents comment that "a girl shouldn't be this messy" or "even boys clean up more than you do".

Are we really open-minded? I somehow don't think so.

Vertigo and Lethargy

For some strange reason, for the last week or so, I've been feeling strangely drained. Sometimes, I would feel sort of dizzy for about five minutes, then feel somewhat normal and most of the time, I feel like falling asleep. When I'm at school, I'm just bored. I just can't seem to feel the fire and passion I've had in the previous years for learning and studying. When I'm at home, I want to get out because I can't stand listening to the sound of my parents yelling. When I'm out, window shopping is just pure torture because the thing with Christmas money is, its easy come, easy go. Also, once I'm out, my parents constantly call me on my cellphone once its past six o'clock to demand when I'm coming home. I've grown to hate my cellphone ringtone, the reason why I'm not changing it since I don't want to end up hating the Mozart ones on there. I can't even stand to hang around my friends since they just have to bring their boyfriends along and remind me of my messed up love life and since this year, this certain person has been barging into the group. I admit that I'm brutally straightforward. When I'm not talking to people in my group of intimate friends, I can sugarcoat everything and be fake, its not hard. When I'm with my close friends, I prefer to be real. To be honest, in the begining, I didn't think too much about her tagging along and I was just myself. Of course, she "isn't used to the way I am" and started obviously antagonising me and all my friends seem to be taking her side. I know there's all that stuff about real friends will stick by you and the only thing I know is the loner has no power and is therefore the scapegoat. Me, having read way too many historical fiction novels for a teenger definitely understands throwing a tantrum or acting out won't give me the upper hand in this situation. So now I have to act all civil and nice towards her even though I will never trust her based on both gut feeling and because I know of the female tendency to hold strong grudges. I can barely stand to go on my computer because I know I should work on "Last Summer" but I just can't seem to get the words out the way I want them to and when I can, only depressing angsty stuff comes out because I just can't seem to get fluffy light cute ideas.

Deep breath, inhale, exhale. Must not forget to breathe.

50 Greatest Canadian Inventions

http://www.cbc.ca/inventions/

On a sudden rush of patriotism, I decided to see just what the 50 greatest Canadian inventions were. Found a couple of interesting things. I never knew that the Wonderbra was a Canadian invention. In fact, I didn't even know what a Wonderbra was as I'm not a big fan of buying multiple, identical lingerie items in a box. Canadarm, the robotic attatchment on the International Space Station was number 14 on the list. The fattening Poutine was number 10.

No wonder we have a shortage of professionals in the medical field. We love Poutines too much to want to know about the artery disease risk and the Canadarm isn't nearly as important to us as increasing the plunge of our cleavages. The Wonderbra was number 5 on the list.

The list wasn't picked by a board of old geezers or anything. People voted according to the "things they couldn't live without."

A Touch of Nostalgia

The weather is really weird on the West Coast of Canada this year. Its snowing like crazy while on the East Coast, where they usually get the snow while we get the mild weather, are enjoying conditions of which its warm enough for guys to go out jogging in shorts without their shirts on. Meanwhile, we're bundling up in big puffy jackets, toques, scarves, and boots like some sort of fluffy present before leaving our electrically heated havens. It reminds of me of when I was little, back when I was four years old and under in Saskatchewan where it didn't just snow, it blizzared. (is that a word?) The weather was so cold that ice froze on the windowsills and I used to poke at the ice while I looked outside at the white blanketed landscape. I used to live in the capital, but even then it wasn't a big city. The same bus driver worked on the same bus route for years and people actually became friends by sitting next to each other on the bus. People seemed to be in just a little be less of a hurry than they are here and drove just a bit slower. We went to small privately owned stores most of the time instead of the huge corporate mega markets and chatted with the owners while we shopped.

At the same time, I remember alot of horrible things about being little. I remember the helplessness as I didn't know how to defy orders of obedience without being punished. Being short and tiny, the only power I had were the power of tears. I know I got my "resistance from tears" genes from my parents because of course, crying never bought me sympathy. At least, not the type of sympathy I needed. Now that I'm older, I realize that my parents yell at me and hit me/threaten to hit me when I cried when I was little was because they couldn't stand the sight of me doing that and they knew that if I continued crying, they would give in to me in the end and they didn't want to do that. But I've had enough experience when I was younger to know that tears must not be lightly shed. Each drop is shed with a plan, a strategy, at the right moment in the right circumstances to get what you want.

I guess I was never really innocent, eh? Always schemingly evil with no good intentions except to advance my own interests. Coldheartedness does start at an incredibly young age...

Understood...or not?

This is one of those questions that I always ask myself: do I want to be understood or not? It always feels good when you have someone agreeing with you; reassuring you that your point of view is "correct". I mean, that's the reason why we spend all those hours on the phone with friends, right? That's why we spend so much time arguing with people until we finally get them to agree with our point. At the same time, I feel like I don't want to expose that part of myself to people. Maybe its reading way too much historical fiction novels or something but I feel like if I do tell somebody so much about myself, I have no backup plan if somebody decides to backstab me. I mean, there's that bit of an almost guilty pleasure knowing that you're not what people think you are. Of course, that causes problems because then I have one more thing to pity myself for when I'm feeling all depressed and shitty: "nobody understands me". I suppose at the same time, there's the big romantic inside of me hoping to find that one guy that I can trust enough and we can be soulmates and all that bullshit. Though of course, there's always that whole thing about how your lover can't be your best friend because then you wouldn't have anyone to complain to about your lover.

People Actually Read My Blog!

I finally switched this from the old Blogger to the new Blogger yesterday and I never got around to it before since I was too lazy to deal with the Google accounts and all that and when I finally did... (*drumroll) I discovered that people actually left comments!!!! The thing is, I never knew that they did because for some reason, the comments wouldn't publish until I allowed them to and me being a technology idiot never realized it.

Another crazy thing is the rant I wrote back in August (http://theunknownforce.blogspot.com/2006/08/rant.html) when I was extremely pissed off was actually featured on http://blogoftheday.org under the "Rant" section and it was given the comment:

"A rather long but well structured rant on the struggles of being a teenager. "

At the moment, the only structure I was probably thinking about was how to destroy the structure of somebody's human body, but holy shit, somebody actually took the time to read through my extremely long rant filled with alot of swearing and self pitying.

I'm also going to stick an apology to GINNYPOTTER18 on HPFF and I'm going to try and contact you somehow since I didn't realize you left a comment on my blog.

All along, I thought nobody actually read my blog. I wonder if there's some sort of way you could check how many hits you get on your blog. Now my mind's floating back to all those times I posted all the weird things here and how many people across the world have read it. It makes me cringe in embarrassment but at the same time, I can feel my head floating in the clouds...ahh life's weird, eh?

"Don't let your morals get in the way of doing what is best for the patient."

http://www.canada.com/nationalpost/story.html?id=81b8727e-b470-4382-a646-386121d9109c

Okay, saw this link on Google News today and my first thoughts at the reading the caption underneath the picture was "this is sick". Basically, the parents of a nine year old girl with the mental state of a 3-6 month old baby had her uterus, breasts, and appendix removed and placed her on Estrogen treatment for two years to stunt her growth and development so it would be easier for them to take care of her. Of course, something like this will have millions of people arguing and debating over whether or not its morally correct to be "altering what God has created" or "deciding what's best for the patient". On the other hand, you have the argument that the life of the patient would improve if it was easier for the parents to take care of the girl and its not like the girl can tell the difference anyways since she has the mentality of a baby less than a year old. I suppose I have no right to express my opinions about this since I have no personal experience in taking care of somebody in that way and I'm not a manically obsessed theologist or anything. It was just something that stuck on my mind after I read it.

New Years Day

This has got to be one of my weirdest posts yet in terms of when and where I'm posting. I'm at a friend's house where I slept over for New Years Eve and I actually didn't ask for her permission to use the computer but I can't find her and I'm the only one awake and my ass is going to get bored off soon. The sleepover was crap, well for me anyways. The boyfriends came over and of course, those of us that haven't fucked up our love lives like me got their New Years kisses while I just sort of stood aside and tried not to stare. Meanwhile afterwards, some shit happened and it turned into a sob fest and me being a cold hearted bitch felt rather apathetic but tried to have some sympathy and by the end of it, everyone just decided to go to sleep.

For some strange reason, even though I got less than four hours of sleep last night, I feel oddly awake.

In 2007, I will not fuck up my love life and will find a guy who is actually worth my time for once.

By the way,

HAPPY 2007!!!!