Sunday, May 20, 2007
The Unbalanced Scales of Love
Why is it that in a relationship, one person always loves or cares about the other person more? I've been on the side of the relationship where I care more, many, many times. It sucks and I know it. Now I'm on the side where the other person cares more, should I be happy? Maybe I should, but I'm not. Every time I am told something that should theoretically go weak in the knees or blush or be flattered or just something, I just don't feel anything. I feel so guilty every time this happens and I don't feel anything, instead of standing there in awkward silence, I just say something back or I kiss him or something like that just so I feel less guilty. I'm beginning to wonder whether I'm incapable of loving anyone but myself or maybe I'm just a cold and hard-hearted girl.
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Hehe i always felt this way !! Why is it that I always liking someone so much and they don't give a damn !! well still haven't experienced the other side should see how I will react :P
I happened upon this page by chance, but i have to say i know what you mean. I am currently going through a messy break up which I instigated because I was tired of always putting the effort in and getting nothing back and to be honest i was getting a bit selfish about it. I've not had many serious relationships, but I always seem to manage to be the one with more feelings invested than the other person, and your right it sucks! Haven't often been on the other side of this phenomena but I understand your feelings of guilt. Unfortunately it seems that is life, I don't think that you love yourself too much. It's just that you've got to look out for number one first, that's not to say you don't or never care for others, but you grow to learn that you can't always depend or rely on other people to be there for you or give you what you need, even the people that love you or you love the most.
--sorry for the long post, it helps sometimes to let things out.
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